Your True Nature is Love.
I had the pleasure recently of going through old videos of my kids as babies. I was watching Nate at about 5 playing with Julian who was less than a year. They were magic with each other. Giggling from deep inside their bodies, their eyes sparkled …..Nate was tickling Julian saying sweet things making Julian erupt in laughter. I was sitting back, looking a little tired but mostly just watching with such joy as the silly play of connecting between them unfolded. The memory of how I felt in that moment still available to me in my body. This wholeness, this depth and joy and overflowing abundance of feeling “full” was palpable. There was nothing I needed and appreciation of the moment for all of us was visible.
Flash forward ten years to today and both boys are still connecting but in more complex ways (i.e. power struggles sometimes, under the surface emotions, and less visible joy) with challenges and with opportunities to grow daily, both for myself and each of them. The lessons come quickly and frequently just like then but the ways I feel it in my body are different. For instance, now it’s more complex for me untangle the differences and navigate ways for them to work through situations. Often I need to check in to not “react” and let them be part of the process of choice. I encourage them to feel their feelings and practice saying what they want, need and to practice kindness all the while, while I’m also being asked to MODEL it. IT”S NOT EASY. It’s far more intellectual and emotional, and very clearly reflects back where I myself am “off”.….It’s work. It demands accountability. It demands me choosing versus reacting, continuously. But, it’s also hugely rewarding.
So as I share this reflection, my personal take away is that those feelings of when they were babies is still inside me. The love, abundance, gratitude and all the goodness that we celebrated daily is all still there and it’s there for you too, in your memories of “what a most loving joyous memory” is that you can re-call -while feeling it in your body. This ability to re-call and self generate that more expanded state of love is a useful tool when you feel depleted, challenged, when your working or even when your playing but working the “edge” to be better. To show up more in your best self. It’s GOOD JUICE!!! It’s the muscle memory of you feeling your true nature most fully.
I showed my oldest son Nate the video of him lovingly tickling his brother….giggling, playing….and Julian adoringly LOVING being beholden by us both. We ALL radiated love and light and it was a shared experience of bliss. Nate said, “mom, I was really like that??”……haha. "Yes, Nate….” and Nate walked down the hallway, I heard him open his brothers door and say something in silly voice to Julian.
So some tips……forgive yourself if you “fall off the love wagon” and dip into your shadows for bit ( ie. negative thinking) It’s human and natural and even needed to look into the subconscious and clear out regularly. However, it’s not a place you want to hang out in regularly. So go into those dark spaces awake and come out clear, unstuck. When youre ready, remember the most amazing loving memory when you were the happiest ever. Take some time and fill up on this memory, FEELING IT IN YOUR BODY. Relish the sensations and take as much as you need. Spend a whole day here if you need.
Eventually, with practice, the love we feel outside of us becomes the love inside, it’s who we are as babies, our nature. It’s our authentic self recognizing itself. It’s the source of “one” , of JOY. This is where we create because it feels safe and good. Every step we take to remember this, honor this, return to this, is one more moment shifting our biology into our biography and creating more opportunities to share it. Love naturally likes to lift others up, expand, and flourish. Love is generous, intuitive, and has to say No, or Yes as it aligns with truth. True nature. It’s unlimited in it’s expression and nourishes all that it touches…..and it’s ALWAYS there! Be open and let it in.