The ability to choose our words, say what we feel, attune to how we want to create in the world happens thru the power we have developed of our voices. Its a creative act of noticing detail, responding from creative choice and refining thru practice. This is represented by the tone, volume, pitch and ability to listen and respond clearly. It's a deeper more subtle awareness to notice the alignment of head and neck, the breathe, and also to note the sensations that words resonate into the body when we find our truth in the moment.
Firstly it's important to note that "power" isn't overpowering those around you in an effort to get your point across. It's also not staying quiet when a conversation is what's needed to bring a truth out, build a new connection, or create anything. Expression takes courage to overcome "group think" and say your insights or even share your silliness, it takes allowing yourself to be vulnerable. To be seen and heard being fully in your truth however grand or sometimes embarrassing that may be later is the risk you take.
Some tips that come from the body are:
1. Notice your posture, in particular the alignment of head and heart. Find a way to stay soft around the jaw and listen in deeply. From the side the ears align over the shoulders and the head is NOT jutting forward, it's "halo" is level and balanced. Allow the head to feel like it's floating up and out instead of a static jammed posture and breathe deeply.
2. Practice FEELING words as sensations. When others talk practice mirroring back the words you FEEL most deeply as a sensation that they say. Listening in on a great conversation that flows back and forth between two people is a lot like an improv dance that flows with grace. It FEELS good. There are marked silences. No one is dominating the conversation, and the choice of words is precise and minimal. It FEELS energizing, not depleting.
3. Practice varying the tone and pitch of your voice. Sing, chant, talk and use the voice to bring more dimension into your conversations. A fiery voice that directs attention to something ( stop, go, this way, open, close etc. are all words that work well with this ) or a watery voice that lingers on the resonant tone of the words you speak. Whispering words just outside the lips yet playing with volume....all of these exercises give you more vocal control and will assist in relaxing muscle tension around the neck.
4. Take care of your neck and throat by hydrating well and drinking lots of lemon water or ginger tea can be nice. Begin to think of your neck and throat as an important part of you that needs nurturing, stimulation, love and attention. Exercises like opening the mouth wide like your taking a bite out of an apple, or moving the tongue around the outside of teeth in one direction then switching and repeating for 20 or so repetitions is great for stimulating the muscles here.
Our voices whether it's thru expressing a thought on a post ( like Facebook) speaking publicly at a convention or having an intimate conversation with a loved one are powerful tools to effect change and to express who we are out into the world. Clearing away the negative inner voices and healing old shame around expression can happen in the process thru remembering to have self compassion ( your growing and this may be a new skill!) and love for yourself. Getting and receiving feedback is part of the art and it's important to know who to ask for it from. What you do with the feedback is the difference between gaining personal power and developing this tool of voice or giving your power away to an old wound or to another person. Every communication can be an opportunity to create and explore this subtler world of holding ones power and growing as well as a deeper appreciation of the elegant dance that communication can be.